Hi Aunt Kay.
A couple of years or so ago, you very kindly provided me with some good advice that got me properly started as a DW. Things have gone well since then.
Charles has made a dozen or more trips OTK. I reckon his performance and attitude are both much improved. Life is good, but of course nothing lasts forever, and every couple of months or so he transgresses sufficiently to earn himself another hot bottom. Needless to say, I am always happy to provide it.
There is a problem looming, however, and I wondered if you might be able to advise, or have any experience of, handling similar situations. I am in the Reserves and will probably (almost certainly) be called up soon. I don't know how long it would be for, but the best guess is anything from six months to a year. Obviously, the likelihood of home leave during that time is remote.
I am certain that this is too long to leave him on his own without any supervision or discipline. Men can too easily get into some bad habits and mischief if they are left on their own for too long. I thought about giving him a good spanking session before I go as a 'behave yourself - or else' warning but, to be honest, that didn't seem very fair although I realize that a bit of discipline is never wasted.
Nor am I very happy to leave it as an open-ended 'Just you wait until I get home, my lad' situation. Being away for so long, I don't want to have a disciplinary backlog to deal with at a time when we might have other things to take care of! Likewise, I am not keen on the thought that his discipline has to be abandoned for the duration with the possibility of all the good work and progress I have made being undone.
I wouldn't object to a third party being involved, but there isn't a wide choice. I don't know any other DWs or 'professionals' and would be quite reluctant to involve anyone we didn't know well. I have confided our lifestyle to only two other people, my mom and a married girlfriend; both of whom I trust and think would be willing and capable of doing a good job if needed. They both live nearby and would be able to keep a close eye on things.
I haven't discussed it with Charles yet, as I want to get some definite thoughts into my head before broaching the subject to him. At the moment, he is under the impression that he will have some sort of 'free pass' while I am away. That is a notion I want to dispel very soon.
That then is the situation. Can you give me any advice/thoughts? I appreciate that I am asking a lot as mine is probably a very unusual problem. But then the circumstances aren't exactly 'everyday' either. When I am away, I will be much happier knowing that disciplinary business in my household is still alive and well and being attended to in a manner I would approve of.
Best wishes,
Tristen
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Hi Aunt Kay,
Thanks very much for your reply to my request. There was some good stuff in there that I will be able to use. I still haven't heard anything officially about going but from what I have been able to glean unofficially, it seems that all those needed will be contacted within the next few days.
> If you lived closer to me, I'd say to send him to his Aunt Kay's for review every couple of weeks! :)<
Believe me, if I could, I would. That would be the most marvelous solution of all. I would be able to sleep peacefully knowing that any backsliding would be suitably rewarded.
>Perhaps use a 'stand in' when you are away <
I am tending towards going down this route. I spoke to my mom after reading your message and told her what I had in mind. She would be pleased to help out and even threw in a few practical suggestions. For instance, she will be able to check daily on the chores I have him do and any omissions or slackness can be added to his list of demerits. She also suggested that the number of demerits he is allowed to accrue before he 'faces the dancing stick' be kept secret so that there is no inclination for him to backslide until he thinks he is getting near and then pull his socks up again.
<But do have him keep a daily diary of his infractions. >
Good idea, and I certainly will. Mom will be able to check on what is on his list and more importantly, anything he misses off it.
I am going to speak to Charles about the arrangements this evening. I am hopeful that any resistance will be overcome merely by his acceptance that he is most unlikely to go that length of time without deserving to be punished for something and also the fact that I have established that other DWs deal with the situation that way. He might even be relieved at the knowledge that I have organized it and that he will be punished if he transgresses while I am away.
Two other suggestions from Mom - I should promise him that he will get a spanking from me when I return for every one he gets from her and also a pre-departure demo session with her. It has been a while since he had a good spanking. Do you think the ideas above and these suggestions have any merit?
Ultimately, I hope not to have to use these arrangements, but if I have to go, I will be happier knowing they exist than I would be otherwise. I hope I don't come over as a very cold-hearted wife at a time like this. It is just that I couldn't bear to think of after the work I have put into this being frittered away.
Once again, many thanks and best wishes.
Regards,
Tristen
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Dear Aunt Kay,
As you suggested, I had a long talk with Charles and told him my intentions. He wasn't very happy, it has to be said, but when I had explained more fully, I think he came round to the realization that it is for his own good in the long run. He did bluster a little about not needing to be supervised and being able to behave himself when alone, but by the time I had pointed out a few of the problems we have had in the recent past, he realized that his arguments didn't hold water.
I had our normal list of things that are 'no - nos' and went through it with him emphasizing those items for which he could expect summary punishment for breaking the rules and the others which would be allowed to accumulate to an arbitrary point which would be my decision in the light of his overall behavior.
Most of this was the same as when things are normal, there are those things he knows he won't get away with under any circumstances, and that still goes. If he transgresses, Mom will be round to deal with it. I added some others to take care of his being on his own, mostly housework and personal habits and routines, that sort of thing. He will also keep a diary of his infractions and use it daily. I have told him that it will be in his own interests to put every single little thing into it, no matter how insignificant, because Mom will be looking at it frequently and if she thinks anything at all is missing, he will be in real trouble. I haven't yet decided whether to make that an immediately punishable offence or not. What do you think?
When I was certain he knew just where he stood and had accepted it, I then told him that Mom would be coming round on Sunday and after we had gone over it all with her, I would get her to give us both a demonstration (I would only be watching - Charles would be feeling!). He argued a bit here, even though I pointed out to him that it was almost impossible that he would be so well behaved as to totally avoid punishment completely, so he was merely going to experience her style slightly sooner than expected. He still wasn't very happy, but when I listed all the things he had displeased me with recently and told him that any further argument would result in him going over my knee beforehand, he gave in.
By the way, when I suggested a demo in my previous message, I think you thought it was me who would be demonstrating. Sorry for the ambiguity. It was Mom who suggested the demonstration as a way of reassuring me that she still retained her spanking skills (perfected on me and my brother) and to let Charles know what he would be in for from her if he deserved it.
I told her what you said about her potential for the DWC. She was pleased but said that my dad is too old to learn new ways now, although he has only just turned 60.
By the time she arrived, I'd had Charles print off two copies of his do's and don'ts lists and the consequences and sign them. I had spoken to her before she came and so we both knew exactly how the session was to be handled. As a concession to his modesty I told him he could wear a pair of swimming trunks, quite skimpy ones (Speedos) so that, on this occasion, he wouldn't need to display his underpants or nudity.
We went through the details again, and they both agreed they understood and would abide by them - Charles somewhat apprehensively.
The discussion had taken longer than expected, and Mom was obviously getting a bit pushed for time and was anxious to make progress. She looked at me and asked if we could proceed with the next stage. I nodded my agreement. She delved into her handbag and, to my surprise, pulled out her own old hairbrush - I had expected her to ask to use mine. From that point, Kay, she was absolutely magnificent. I think even you would have been impressed.
"Right, young man," she said, "you are going over my knee to get a good dose of this hairbrush. So, let's have you on your feet, at least to start with." When he was standing in front of her she told him that I had given her a long list of his recent faults and although he wasn't getting it specifically as punishment for them, I had kindly agreed to consider the slate as being wiped clean with the spanking he was about to get and so she was going to show him precisely how dim a view she took of young men who didn't behave themselves.
She told him to take down his trousers and bend over her knee. When he was in position, she pulled up his Speedos at the back until she had completely bare cheeks to work on. She gave him a last warning about keeping his hands on the floor and not struggling or she would start all over again, and then she started.
I counted about forty whacks in all. She spanked hard, fast and deliberate and the whole thing only took a minute or so. I was very impressed and I think Charles was too but most of what was coming out of his mouth was incoherent by the end. I think he had just found out what a really painful spanking feels like. It was the first time I had seen him reduced to tears by a sore bottom.
She let him up and told him to let that be a lesson to him of what he could expect if she ever had to put him over her knee again. Throughout I was really impressed by her matter-of-fact scolding and control. Her generation really has it when it comes to OTK discipline.
I decided he could do some corner time while I made a pot of tea and Mom got her breath back (she is obviously out of condition). Then she and I sat and talked about the session until she left when I released Charles from his corner and gave him a lot of really affectionate hugs and kisses. He had regained his composure by then, but his bottom was like a beacon and red hot to the touch.
We have talked a couple of times since about the session and one of the consequences is that I have told him that when I get back home I will be a lot stricter with him and his punishments will be of the same level as Sunday's session - including any 'follow up' spankings I give him after Mom has dealt with him. I think I need to take a far more assertive role from now on.
He doesn't know it, but I have shown Mom how to check the Internet history on our computer so I will be able to monitor his surfing habits. I have told him I don't want any misbehaving in that area, although he is allowed to read your pages. I hope you don't think that is too sneaky of me.
I know I have wittered on at great length. Apologies for that, but I am so relieved that these arrangements are in place. I don't know what will happen until I get back home but if it is of any help to you, I will write and bring you up to date then. I could even have Charles report more frequently if you would like - might at least keep him out of mischief.
So once again, Kay, thank you for your help and confidence-boosting site. I certainly could not do it without both.
Hugs,
Tristen
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Hi Aunt Kay,
You may remember, I wrote to you a few months ago before I was called up to go to the Gulf. You asked me to keep in touch so I thought you might be interested to hear how things went in my absence.
I was able to keep in touch with home regularly and spoke briefly with Charles often. I was also able to call my mother a couple of times a week. That way I was able to form a fairly accurate picture of how things were 'back at the ranch'.
He behaved quite well generally, keeping himself in good order, seeing to the daily/periodic household chores and also doing a list of jobs I left for him. He did reasonably well maintaining his personal daily diary/record of infractions but had a few small omissions that came to light when Mother carried out her weekly review. This was something I had asked her to do in addition to looking in on him a couple of times every week, the thought being that she could then point out anything which he was 'sailing close to the wind' with.
I received reports of these omissions from both of them, and to be fair, the first two could be construed as a difference in interpretations of what was required. I did, though, emphasize to Charles how very much importance I placed on his diary as a means to knowing how he was getting on at home while I wasn't there to see things for myself. I tried to leave him in no doubt whatsoever that any further failure in that respect would not be considered so lightly.
I also reaffirmed the position with Mom, assuring her that his next omission would be acted upon and telling her she should continue to be vigilant and also be certain that it was an omission that should not have occurred. After that he started putting everything in the diary whether they were infractions or not, just to be on the safe side. It was inevitable, though, that a third would happen along, and it did.
As it happens, I heard about it first from Mom and right away I knew that it was something he had tried to hide deliberately, having been caught out with the same thing by me quite a while before. I immediately authorized him to be punished, telling her that I would get Charles to call her after I had spoken with him and she could then make the arrangements to deal with him the following evening.
When I spoke to Charles, I could tell right away that he was 'on edge' and after we got through the usual normal things we spoke about, I asked him if he had anything else to tell me and he confessed. I listened to what he had to say and then told him that he had let both himself and me down badly and for that he would be spanked. I then told him to call Mother right away and to tell her that he was phoning on my instructions to ask her to punish him.
To cut a long story short, she arranged to deal with him the next evening and duly did so leaving one very contrite, well-spanked son-in-law to pull himself together again. I am told that the session was a lot more 'impressive' than even her 'demonstration' before I left!
As it happened, all this took place just the week prior to my returning home, and so if he had only behaved himself a little longer, he would have escaped both being punished by Mom and my own follow-up spanking which he has also now received. I used the same fast and hard method as Mom. It was very satisfying to both see and hear the results and to know it was so effective. He knows now that spankings in the future will be real punishments!
Intriguingly, from a few things Mom has said, I get the impression that, unlikely though it seems, she and my dad are at least contemplating joining the lifestyle. I haven't yet had the chance to talk privately to her but can't wait to find out if my suspicions have any basis. Now that would be interesting!!
I must thank you again, Kay, for your help and for just 'being there'. You must be very proud indeed, knowing you are the catalyst that has enabled so many women across the world to embrace a matriarchal OTK lifestyle so emphatically. Do you ever get that 'good job well done' feeling when you think about the countless scalded bottoms, corner times, tears shed and wrongs punished you have undoubtedly generated over the years? Certainly, you are fully entitled to enjoy a warm glow of satisfaction about it all.
Once again, thank you.
Very Best Regards,
Tristen
PS: FOLLOWUP
I have spoken to Mom about my suspicions and I was right! Here’s the story she told me:
When she first explained to Dad how she would be helping me out while I was away, he was, of course, very surprised but seemed quite positive and receptive about it all. She said that subsequently he brought the subject up from time to time and it became obvious his interest and curiosity had been aroused by it.
Apparently, they talked a few times around the broader issues involved, but at no time did Dad ever express a desire, or suggest they adopt, the lifestyle themselves.
This continued to the point where I had authorized Mom to punish Charles and when she told Dad that the punishment would take place the following evening and that she had been asked (by me) to make sure Charles got a good hiding, Dad was again very positive making comments like, 'It's for his own good' and, 'He only has himself to blame'.
At this point, Mom decided to test the water and said to Dad that she would be just as capable of giving two naughty bottoms what they deserved. When Dad asked what she meant, she replied that, given his interest in the matter, she thought that perhaps he could benefit from a dose of what Charles was going to get. He blustered through for a few minutes, so Mom didn't push it then, but the next evening, as she was getting ready to go round and deal with Charles, she tried again.
When Dad saw her putting her hairbrush into her bag, he made some comment about 'not sparing the rod'. Mom assured him that she wasn't going to and then added that she had meant what she'd said the previous evening, repeating her assertion that he might benefit from a dose of the hairbrush, and that she would be happy to oblige him once she had dealt with Charles.
Dad looked at her as if he didn't quite know what to say, and so Mom continued by telling him that she had to leave right away but that she should be back home in half an hour, so, she suggested, if Dad was interested in trying it out, he should wait for her return in their bedroom, with his trousers down.
With that, she left and went round to attend to Charles's punishment, which has already been covered elsewhere, but was everything I had asked her to ensure it would be.
On her return home, Dad wasn't in his usual place in the lounge - in front of the television, and so Mom went straight to their bedroom with her hairbrush in her hand, and there he was, waiting for her, trousers at his ankles. Crossing to the bed she sat down and beckoned for him to stand in front of her. "So you are interested in sampling my hairbrush on your bottom?" she asked, and he replied that he was.
"Do you think you need a spanking?" she continued. Dad replied that he only wanted to see for himself what it was like - to experience it.
"You might not see much but you'll certainly feel it," Mom assured him. "I think you deserve a spanking and I'm happy to have the opportunity to give it to you." When Dad didn't answer she continued. "Here is what I propose. I will spank you, hard, as I have just spanked Charles. Then later, when you have stopped crying, we will have a good, long talk about what I expect from you in the future in terms of behavior. Do you still want to go ahead?" Dad, somewhat sheepishly, said he did. "Right. Bare your bottom and bend over my knee please!" Mom ordered.
What followed, Mom described as 'a good hiding' and, knowing Mom, I am in no doubt whatsoever that that is exactly what it was. Understandably perhaps, Mom didn't confide to me all the things they discussed subsequently, but I got the distinct impression that she did most of the talking, the result of which is that yet another wife has espoused the gospel of Aunt Kay, and yet another husband can look forward to receiving the benefits from a DWC lifestyle.
Mom is a quiet, shy, retiring person but she has proved to be second to none in matters of discipline. I am so very proud of her - and Dad.