Dear Aunt Kay,
Hi. Well, I must say that I truly believe that if there were no women on this planet (God forbid!), the whole place would implode!
Shirley taught me another valuable lesson this past weekend. As you are aware, it's that time of year again... Football season. I don't know why, but I love the game, probably a tad too much!
Anyway, I sometimes feel lucky and of course get foolish and place a wager on a game. Last night was one of those times. I let it ride all on one game. It was one of those 'please let me win and I'll quit forever' bets. I did win. However, I did not tell my girlfriend at first. But when I did tell her, she smiled and said that she knew all along! I asked her how in the world could she have known that and she replied saying, "I just have a way of knowing when my bad little boy is up to no good!".
Then I then knew I was in trouble. She said that we had already had the talk about gambling so she was quite upset. But, since I did tell her before she had to confront me about it, the spanking would be just a little less severe. She then took me over her knee and I got it good with her hand followed by that awful hairbrush!!! She then made me promise that the winnings would be used to pay off the last of my credit card and any remaining will go to my parents for letting me live with them right now.
I told her that was a good idea. After all, they've put up with a lot for 29 years! I don't think I'll be gambling anymore. It's just not worth it, even if I win.
Since I've been with her, I've curved my alcohol consumption, cut way back on smoking, and as of last night, I'm done gambling. She has worked wonders for me! And my parents still don't know how! They just marvel at what an effect she has on me. I know they're ready for me to settle down!
Sincerely,
Todd